Rise of the Runelords

This is a fertile land & we will thrive. We will rule over all this land.

The strangest thing happened today, it was right after we found Nuala Tobin under Thistletop. She was looking particularly demony. She had this big red claw hand and the hell hound but I didn’t get to see much more because that thing happened. It’s hard to describe but it… wasn’t fun or interesting being there anymore, I just wanted to leave. It was strange because we had such a great time getting there well except for Emrys, he got his head cut off by a cat. A lot of stuff happened since the last time. Let’s see after we got out of the thistles we found the top bridge. On the other side was a big house, a bunch ’a goblins playing outside with a seagull. We got more help from that mysterious giant wolf. He snuck up on em chomp chomp. We went inside & met King Ripnugget. He was riding this big lizard so I though he was smart but then he tried to trick Mal. He told him he wanted to talk then charged at him as a bunch more goblins poured out of the other rooms. You should have seen how close Mal let him come to hitting him before he danced out of the way. We overthrew Ripnugget and that’s how I became the new King of Thistletop. We found their kitchen next. I guess goblin diets is mostly Pickles & people parts. Anyway we were so happy to find that there was a basement which is always the best part of a building & this one didn’t disappoint! First we ran in to Bruthazamist well ran him over is more like. He went straight for Emrys’ pointy ears but found Mal pointy swords instead; he didn’t even get a shot in. Neither did the next three we ran into, we caught them in there beds. We’ll kill every last one of those ugly green kuntz. Did you know that people taste things differently, even if they are best friends? It was so tasty when we ate together but. Well any way next we met a guy named Orek he had a shield taller then Mal! He said he just got hired by Nuala & didn’t realize how crazy everyone here was. He promised to stop by Sandpoint on his way home & let them know what was happening. Then we fought 2 demonic dogs. Mal’s been teaching WKT how to fight better but he still doesn’t quite get it yet. He kept trying to hide to get a surprise attack but the fight had already started & one of them definitely knew he were there. The other one had a face full of Rhombus! So we didn’t see anyone else around & started looking for treasure. Oh not hero treasure, regular stuff like magik things. That’s how we found her. She was invisible but she had a bunch ‘a magical stuff on her & Mal & me, we don’t leave treasure behind! It was so funny I sensed her stuff just floating there, objects in space. Then she appeared & set me on fire she was a wizard. She looked like she wanted to run then someone said something about Tsuto then she went all crazy eye & shattered WKT’s hammer. Then Emrys set her on fire & she got stabbed a bunch. There was a secret door behind the shelves & guess what DOUBLE BASEMENT! Oh that’s right we forgot rule number 1 when fighting wizards never forget about the familiar. It streaked right out of the shadows then it ran right over my shoe then jumped in the air& cut Emrys’ head off in one swipe. It was so fast no one was able to catch it. We gathered up his stuff & headed down. There were traps but Mal took care of them. It’s realy funny watching WKT swing that little sword like a hammer he looks so embarrassed every time he takes it out.

We found Nuala & that strange thing happened. The next room had all this illusionary gold and Big Gugmuck was there, the last of the goblin heroes who lasted a little longer than the hobgoblin. Then there were the ghosts you couldn’t even hit them without majik. They drained WKT & Mal’s strength. Then there was this secret door with a giant crab that was using an even bigger golden helmet as a shell. In the water was a necklace that uhh disappeared. So then we figured out the trick to the coin wall & found a room with thick dusty floors & a ghost of another former king. He seemed realy worried about some guy named Alazanist he was involved in whatever ruined the kingdom. Then there was the torture stuff room. Were we found a seven pointed star key. Which opened a 10,000 year old door inside was Malfeshnakor who looked like a big eared talking monkey on all fours. With his strength drained WKT was having a rough fight even with Blackhands nearly killing himself trying to keep him healed. WKT wasn’t able to properly back up Mal & he used charm majiks on …someone. -Well after that we found another key that w….. I went back & buried Emrys- We decided to take an uneventful nap.

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TheGolux

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